Synergistic Parenting

Ways to parent may increase creative synergy

Tantrum stop

Brothers, sisters fight

Having to repeat

Clean your room

Vaccinate? NEW

Sex and drugs




"I goofed"

TV, music revised

Power struggles



Avoid training wheels

yes-no game

hated clothes in the back seat




This web site results from leading dozens of parenting groups. Parents shared problems that led them to join groups. They then showed creativity in solving problems as they learned Synergistic Parenting. Using it, their energy often led a child to apply their energy to the situation, creating synergy. And, parents found more joy in parenting.

As you practice these problem solving tools, remember that they will work effectively as you practice them as an expression of your love for your child. These are not gimmicks, but are tools that you can develop and fine-tune to express your love for your child and strengthen your child’s trust of parents.

Perhaps the best summary of your attitude and outlook that you try to express is what my Dad called the three A’s:

  • acceptance…
  • appreciation…
  • affection… and I add a fourth: affirming each child.

Think about each of these A's in terms of how you can express that quality with each child.

The purpose of Synergistic Parenting is to lead children to be self-sufficient and independent as supported by parents. When our first-born was about four he called out just after bedtime. When we rushed in, he told us to get rid of the monster in the closet. I said, “You tell the monster!” He sat up straight, looked at the closet, and said in his strongest voice, “Monster, stay in the closet,” fell back and was asleep in minutes — with a kiss from each of us. What did he learn? What would he learn if we had told the monster?

Parents said this approach helped them find better ways to parent and why these skills help. If you want help for any problem to the left, click on it. To explore Synergistic Parenting click it below.

Synergistic Parenting is not meant to provide therapy for individual problems, such as depression or addiction, for that please consult a therapist to work with your family on your specific needs.

Through these pages you will find in the center of some pages


Click on it to experiment with different ways to respond to what a youngster says. Respond means think of answers that encourage your child to talk with you so you develop the child’s ability to make mature decisions, and help the child explore their feelings. When you are busy, instead of "no" make a date to talk later.

Should parents be drill instructors or let children be in control? Synergistic parenting says parents know more, so are in charge in a mutually give-and-take finding the best way. Children are respected in their individual personalities, ages, and feelings. Parents—single or two—and children grow in teamwork, and have as much fun as possible — synergy!

When you may not feel very energetic, this way to parent may be synergistic!

many stickers available

Credit: I wrote scripts for the Experiments which our daughter edited, then recorded.

Copyright © 2003, 2006 John F. Yeaman